Lesson Learned: 200-pound chimpanzee rips Connecticut woman's face off in violent attack.

There's a reason normal people stick to cats and dogs and rabbits and such when deciding on pets for the home: THEY USUALLY DON'T RIP YOUR F*CKING FACE OFF!!!

Sandra Herold, 70, of Stamford, Connecticut on Monday desperately pleaded over the phone with police to help her stop Travis, her 15-year-old pet chimp, from mauling friend and neighbor 55-year-old Charla Nash.

After arriving on the scene, police found a helpless (and faceless) Nash on the ground while Herold, the chimp's owner, frantically stabbed her beloved pet with a butcher knife and assaulted him with a shovel. After cornering one police officer near his patrol car and lunging at another, police shot and killed the berserk animal. The victim was later transported to an area hospital where she is currently listed in critical condition.

The owner admitted on Monday that the chimp seemed agitated earlier in the day and that she had given him the anti-anxiety drug Xanax in some tea. The drug had not been prescribed for the chimp. Though it is legal for Harold to have had the pet, police are looking into the possibility of criminal charges. A pet owner can be held criminally responsible if he or she knew or should have known that an animal was a danger to others.

While getting dressed for work this morning, CNN played portions of the owner's dramatic calls to 911 that Stamford police released yesterday. Audio of that call is below. Fair warning...it's semi-disturbing. You can actually hear the animal, which had been previously featured in Old Navy commercials, shrilling in the background as he attacked the victim.

Yikes!