Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Why do black people hate sushi?

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

What the fuck is up with that, huh?

How could you not want to devour -- scratch that -- annihilate everything on that plate up there? Yummmmm!

Obviously, I love the stuff. Well...some of it. I'm not too fond of anything made with eel of ground tuna. I like my tuna chunk, please. Every time I try to invite a black person out for sushi, they turn you down quicker than Amy Winehouse turns down rehab.

Darius (T. Williams) and I went back and forth today via email about this.

Read his responses. Oh so typical.

From: Mr. Jones [mailto:XXXXXXXX]
Sent: Wednesday, January 23, 2008 8:18 AM
To: Darius T. Williams
Subject: RE:

I just emailed a co-worker asking about a sushi spot that just opened down the street. I want to have lunch there Friday. Mad hungry, right?


From: Darius T. Williams [mailto:XXXXXXXX]
Sent: Wednesday, January 23, 2008 9:21 AM
To: Mr. Jones
Subject: RE:

Sushi? Yuck-o. The only fish I eat has to be fried w/hot sauce...


From: Mr. Jones [mailto:XXXXXXXX]
Sent: Wednesday, January 23, 2008 8:28 AM
To: Darius T. Williams
Subject: RE:'s tastes great and is great for you! I can't get enough of the stuff. I wonder why black people don't like sushi.


From: Darius T. Williams [mailto:XXXXXXXX]
Sent: Wednesday, January 23, 2008 9:36 AM
To: Mr. Jones
Subject: RE:

Because it tastes like hot spit on a stick.

I had it once and it was absolutely horrible. And if you steam the fish, pan sear it, or bake it -
it's just as good for you...


From: Mr. Jones [mailto:XXXXXXXX]
Sent: Wednesday, January 23, 2008 9:48 AM
To: Darius T. Williams
Subject: RE:

Open your mind and try it again. You probably just had a roll that wasn't tasty. When you come to Baltimore, we'll go for sushi.


From: Darius Williams [mailto:XXXXXXXX]
Sent: Wednesday, January 23, 2008 9:49 AM
To: Mr. Jones
Subject: RE:

Um, we're not eating sushi. Where's the fried fish joint? Can we go there instead?


From: Mr. Jones [mailto:XXXXXXXX]
Sent: Wednesday, January 23, 2008 9:58 AM
To: Darius T. Williams
Subject: RE:



Darius T. Williams said...

Um, so was this conversation posted without my permission? LOL

But seriously, sushi? OMG - it's so nasty. I don't like things wrapped in nori (seaweed). Sea weed tastes like um, the sea - and who wants to eat the sea? No one.

And then the fish - it's raw, slimy, mushy, and definitely not palatable. It makes me want to throw up just thinking about it.

So, I'll pass. But if saving my stomach means I'm typical - then I'll be typical. Just have some cornmeal, lawry's seasoning salt, loo-siana hot sauce, and catfish (yes, catfish - chicago all the way) waiting on me when I get to b-more. Ohh, w/some cornbread and a pan of baked macaroni & cheese and some red kool-aid. Um, hello! Are we talking about good times...or what. Break out the old school jams and a card table for the real bid whist playas and I'm all good!

Typical...geesh...who's typical?


Mr. Jones said...

Let me set you straight, Darius.

ALL SUSHI ISN'T RAW!!! You can even get some deep fried. I'm sure that tickles your fancy.

And you can get all the catfish you want when you come here. If the grocery store within walking distance doesn't have it, then we'll drive to one. Or you can always fish something out of the Inner Harbor. Just throw the dead bodies back in.

Darius T. Williams said...

LOL - you're right - all sushi isn't raw. But, all sushi is nasty. It really is. Tastes like hot spit on a really does. That's why they give you wasabi or pickled ginger to cover up that ol' nasty taste.

Fishing? Inner Harbor? No sir - ya boy doesn't fish. Well, it depends on what you mean...nevermind.

Cocoa Rican said...

Fuck what you heard... minorities get down with it. We just have to start reminding folks to stop with the yuks and eeeks before trying shit.
My man is trying all kinds of stuff since we've been together... sure, I'm using other things as bait, but you get the picture...

::::Baby, if you eat this sushi and rare porterhouse now, you can have some of this later...::::: like a charm. ; )

D.LavarJames said...

I heard that Cocoa!!! I love sushi too, so it's def. not black people not eating it.

Darius T. Williams said...

Speaking of porterhouse - mine better come medium well!

Anonymous said...

Darius- We can certainly do without another throw up story.

Mr. Jones said...

Darius - I was being facetious.

Cocoa - You're too much. lol.

D.Lavar - You know what I mean. Majority of black people.

Darius - Ok! I don't do rare meat. I'll take mine medium to medium well depending on how well I know the resturant.

Captain - Exactly.

La said...

once again I am cracking up over here at yall.

I don't particularly care for sushi either but I think it's moreso because I haven't found a combination I like yet. I keep trying. My friends love it, so I always try some of their concoctions. SOme of them aren't so bad... some of them make me throw up a lil in my mouth, lol

Kyon Saucier said...

I don't like sushi it's gross but Japenese cooked food...Awesome.

ProfessorB said...

I like sushi, too. I've tried to get my best friend and mother to try it. And I have to teach them that there sushi can be raw, cooked, or contain no meat.

It's not surpising that Americans love artery clogging fast foods but can't get down with healthier foods. And it shows.

BTW, I haven't tasted seaweed that tasted like the sea, Darius. You must have had some old sushi

Anonymous said...

Sushi not made for Black people.

Primo said...

Always Wanted to try it. But all the people in my life agree wit yall black or rican peeps dont eat sushi. lmao.

j_shanlin (Jared) said...

Soooo... the thing is.... sushi... ummmm.... rhymes with uhhhh.... vagina, and I just cannot do it! Now I've tasted both :(, and because of the similarity in taste, I just can't take it! I can't eve eat chicken wingettes because you have to stick your tongue between those 2 bones and it reminds me of.... well you know.. What sushi place in B.More are you talking about?

bLaQ~n~MiLD said...

Ummmmm I've never had sushi but the whole idea of it scares me personally. I do like California rolls tho...with the lil (allegid) crab meat. Mmmmmmm mmmmmmm good.


That Dude Right There said...

I don't eat sushi for the same reason that you don't eat rare or raw steak! Cause I think it's disgusting.

When I think about sushi, I think about raw fish!!!! If I eat it raw, it better had grown from a root and have had leaves.

Kensilo said...

I am not a sushi fan either.. sorry

fuzzy said...

I am going from newer posts to all the ones I missed! I have to stay on top of you! I fall behind on your blog and it takes me like an hour to catch up!

I love sushi and sashimi! I'm a chef, I have broadened my horizon and i like a vast area of diverse foods! sue me! Anyone want escargot? :-)

yet another black guy said...

did i tell you i finally had sushi not too long ago? and i F-ing LOVE it!! i wish i had tried it before.

brran1 said...

I like Sushi. I go to a spot in Inner Harbor East right on the water and I usually get the 3 raw rolls w/ a side of steamed vegetables.

Ragemanchoo said...

Darius, How about you head down to the Mack-Donalds so people with sophisticated palates don't have to listen to your shit. Okay? Okay. :)

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